Late last month I got a last-minute call from my Dad telling me my uncle brought my Grandma JB to Gardnerville for an extended visit. I immediately took a day off and bought a ticket to go spend time with her, as I have not seen her for years.
Going home always has its own difficulties. Going to see Grandma was nerve-wracking. She’s 92 as of Tuesday, and she’s senile. She didn’t recognize me. When I told her my name, she’d be excited fro a few moments, but 10 minutes later she didn’t know who I was. She saw me as a benevolent stranger who was kind enough to help her down the sidewalk so she wouldn’t trip, or fetch her a cup of tea.
Her humor is still there. She also misses her alcohol – she asks for highballs at least 6 times a day. She is lonely. She wants to talk to people and go out to do things. I wish I could do something to change her circumstances. There are so many factors influencing her quality of life in negative ways, but it has been made clear that I am an outsider and consequently no voice in her care.
I’ve been depressed about it for over a month now. I can’t do a goddamned thing to fix it, thanks for asking.
I can only say what I think, which is this: You can’t ask people to treat you better than you treat others. Every day you show those you love how you want them to treat you in similar circumstances.
Things I Learned This Week:
I will always help my worst enemies. And then I’ll hope for better from them, even if it never happens.
Tivo + Netflix is awesome.
In 2012 cell phones are so awesome that they will work up to the minute the world ends.
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