14Jun

From the Twilight Zone

Filed in Adventures in Minden | Amusing | Oboe | Things I Learned This Week Leave a comment

This post is a little early this week, but I’ve had a few interesting things happen this week that were post-worthy.

The Gig That Came and Went

I got a last-minute call last weekend from a conductor in Tahoe who needed me to sub for a performance and series of rehearsals.  So after some time arranging, we managed to meet up for him to hand off the music.  The amusing part was he called me when I was halfway there to inform me he was stuck because an excavator fell on someone’s house.  Apparently it tilted off the truck carrying it when going around a curve.

The second amusing part of the story was the day after I got the music, I get a message saying rehearsal was cancelled, followed by another message a few days later letting me know the entire performance was cancelled.  I have no idea what happened there, but that was the quickest turnaround on a gig I’ve ever had.  So today I got to drive up to Carson on my lunch break to give him the music.  No excavator incidents this round.  It was just a weird week.

The Mosquito Disaster

All of my life I’ve lived in dry places, and in general have had very few run-ins with mosquitos.  A few months ago I moved to downtown Minden, and once spring arrived I realized there are mosquitos everywhere.  It’s very damp, surrounded by pastures and irrigation, and as a result is a haven for the little bastards.

I got bite on my arm first.  Instead of being a normal-sized bump with moderate itching, it turned into this giant rash with hives, and felt like a bruise.  After the initial panic and near-overdose of Benadryl, I did my homework and discovered I’m allergic to them (surprise!).  For the most part, I don’t react too bad to them.  But if they hit my on the arms or hands, I start developing mutant lumps.  One got in my house a couple of nights ago and feasted on my wrist and hand.  The hand is swollen, which is pretty neat.  I may be dying. If you want into my will, now’s the time to ask.

The Ex: Wat

Last week I was telling someone about the whole deal with the ex-husband and the divorce.  In a strange turn of events, the next morning I get a message from Linked In telling me he viewed my profile.  The really bizarre part was the message listed his current company as the old company I used to work for in Vegas.  I still keep in touch with a lot of people there, and I had not heard he was hired.

Doing the only obvious thing I could, I contacted my former partner-in-crime Matt, and when I asked if he knew so-and-so was my ex-husband.  His response was “Say what?”.  Turns out he’s been there a year, and nobody had a clue that we were once married.  So either he never put two and two together (I changed my name entirely after we were married), or he’s been prudent and kept his mouth shut.  If it’s the latter, that’s pretty funny (and nice of him).

The Fallout

Of course, Matt being who he is, was determined to ask him about me.  I said: “You won’t hear anything I haven’t told you.  I was a fat neurotic mess when we were married.”

That part is true.  There was a lot that went wrong that I won’t air out on the internet.  But the fat neurotic mess:  that was definitely me.  What certainly did not help the relationship were the antidepressants I was taking for anxiety.  They had this effect of making me a little crazy and causing me to gain weight at the speed of light.  I fought it tooth and nail, but no matter what I did I just kept gaining.  This is a pretty nifty picture of me most of the way through the weight gain.  That weight gain made me more neurotic and depressed, and it just made it all worse.  Right after he left to go on his tour overseas, I decided to stop taking those stupid pills.  I quit filling prescriptions and tapered them off.  By the time he came back a year later I was completely stable and had lost a good chunk of the weight. Over the next couple of years it fell off.  Then I started running and more fell off.

Today I weigh 50 pounds less than I did in those days.  I’ve had some ups and downs, but overall my weight has remained stable.  It makes me happy to know I got a degree of control over that part of me.

I am not dwelling on the negative aspects of it, nor do I feel regret.  If anything it all makes me more appreciative for what I have now.  That divorce started me on the path to a better life.  I’m a better person, I like myself, I love my life, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Things I Learned This Week

Jack will bark at the wind, but tremble in fear under my chair if something scares him.  Not a good guard dog.

Dating a drummer:  totally worth the exception to my no-musicians policy.

I sink more money into my oboe than I make in gigs.

09Jun

To the internets!

Filed in My Life | Things I Learned This Week Leave a comment

I started talking to the dog (Jack) a little while ago, which made me think I should probably go unload some of the things floating around in my head.  Logical course of action:  post it on the internets!

It’s either that or sit here and scratch the 3,000 mosquito bites I have.  I feel like a blood donor.

Over the course of the last week I’ve lost one friend and gained another.  I’ll call that a break even.  One I had to stop because he wanted more than friendship from me, which is something I can’t ever give him.  The other I actually met on my latest dating site binge.  We never made it to the first date, but we’ve gotten to know each other well and I’ve kept in touch with him.

Speaking of dating site binges, I went on another one starting about a month ago.  It’s like a never-ending cycle.  Sign up on dating site, try dating for several weeks, then quit in disgust (or on odd occasions, meet someone).  I’ve never been ashamed of using dating sites, even when it was relatively unpopular.  I’ve been at it for a long time.  I don’t go out to clubs or bars, and even when I do, I don’t pick up people (or allow myself to get picked up).  I’m sure it’s possible to meet someone at a bar, but it’s not my thing.  Other social events I go to tend to be populated by happily married couples with several kids, so it’s not ideal.

This latest binge produced some interesting results compared to the last few rounds:  a handful of not-so-terrible dates, a really great date + second date + upcoming third (hooray!), and I made a friend.  I call that a win.  Or maybe just that I’ve hit that age range where dating is a little more to the point.

Dating sites really aren’t that bad.  It’s great because you get to know them a bit before agreeing to meet them.  Sometimes it works out.  Sometimes it’s terrible and you’re looking for the exit.  I think the worst attributes of dating sites are when people lie.  Lie about what they do, what they like, what they look like.  Also people looking for quick hookups, but you can generally spot them a mile away.  I like to think I’m honest about who I am, but there’s only so much you can convey through a few pictures and paragraphs.  Most guys seem to like the blue and red hair, so that’s good.

Things I Learned This Week:

I should use evite for proper head counts when planning a get together

I need to buy an English Horn.  After I get the oboe.

Mosquitos suck.

My nephew Max is adorable.  I got three “I love you Nenes” this weekend.

Running into old high school pals is always a good time.

I’m glad I make it a point to spend every Carson Valley Days with my family.

03Jun

Oh hai

Filed in Adventures in Minden | Oboe | Office Space | Spot & Jack | Things I Learned This Week Leave a comment

I felt the need to do another post.  About random crap nobody cares about.  Why?  Well, I’ve had this blog since 2002, I’m now going for the 20 year mark.  Because I can.

I’ve fully settled into my new place.  It’s pretty awesome.  Built in the 1950s, hardwood floors, original cabinets and stove.  Good sized yard with green all over the place, including grapes, apples, rhubarb (sort of), and blackberries.  Flowers everywhere.  Centrally located so I can get away with walking to most events downtown.  My landlords are a lot of fun, I like it when they come over to check on things I find – they’re good company and they like my dog.

RE:  The rhubarb.  Somebody swiped it all.  I don’t know when or how (come on, I’m home almost all the time), but someone went back there and hacked off all the stalks and cut one of the flowers off.  I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR PIE, JERK.

I’ve been dating. Not all of them have been terrible.  I’ve met a few interesting people.  I’ve met a few people I’d prefer not to meet again.  Might have made a friend.  It’s far better to try meeting someone than to hole up here in my house with my cat and dog, slowly turning into the old spinster next door.  I have been eyeing some fuzzy slippers and a housecoat, though.

In one of my previous posts I mentioned my work was on an upturn, and I am happy to say I was correct in that assessment.  I don’t think I’ve enjoyed my job as much as I have in the last few months.  I’ve been crazy busy, but I’ve had plenty to keep my brain occupied.  I’m learning.  I’m getting to do developer-ish things every so often.  I think it’s a well-rounded job that suits me well.  I’m glad they let me stick around.  I also suckered one of my old TSS buddies into joining our company (incurring the wrath of a certain guy named Matt in the process).  I win.

Orchestra is plugging along, but it’s wearing me out.  Since I’m starting to feel a little bored, I decided to tackle playing a for-reals concerto with a for-reals orchestra.  Concerto TBD (Haydn, Mozart, Marcello, Bellini?), 2013-2014 concert season.  All those years working on my degree, and this was something I never tried.  It is second on my music bucket list (the first being a for-reals audition, which I did last November).   I plan on busting my ass to make it as perfect as I can, and more than that I hope it’s entertaining for anyone who comes to listen.  I’ll be recording that as well (third on the bucket list, getting a recording of me playing something solo).  It will also cover bucket list item four: getting a new oboe.  I’m so buying a new oboe for this.  I may be a bit obsessed.

So, on to Things I Learned this week Since  My Last Post:

People steal rhubarb, wtf

My dog Jack has severe separation anxiety, and all the treats and toys in the world won’t make a dent.

The ability to create a good reed decreases in proportion to the number of days before you have a concert.

I’m allergic to mosquito bites.  The welt on my arm is pretty sweet.

Trying to resurrect feelings for someone that you’ve spent 2 months getting over is a futile exercise.

26Apr

Why Spot is my BFF

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I felt the need to explain to a co-worker why I was so attached to my cat.  I dug up this story from one of my old Formspring posts, and thought it was pretty hilarious, so I am posting it here.

I love cats. I also think my cat is the best cat ever. And I have proof.

Years go I was married. My ex-husband was in the military. A couple of years into our marriage he had to go overseas for a full year, leaving me alone in the states. He said “hey, let’s get you a cat or dog so you won’t be alone in the house!” I decided on a cat. Six months before he left, we went out and adopted a kitten from a rescue shelter, and I named him Spot.

Six months later, my husband left for South Korea.

Unknown to me, my marriage was taking a steep nosedive. At first my husband called and emailed all the time. Usual conversations of “what did you do today” and “miss you”. Three months in, the calls became infrequent, and the emails rare. He came back mid-year for a vacation, and everything seemed to be fine. His excuse for lack of communication was he was busy/time difference. Okay fine. He headed back to South Korea after his vacation, and his communication became downright rare.

At the end of his tour in South Korea, we were going to move to his new post in Colorado. I emailed him asking for details (to no avail), and did my best to prepare for the impending move. Two months before he was due back, I finally get a phone call. Conversation starts with me going on about how much I missed him, blah-de-blah. At that point he cut me off and said “We need to talk, I don’t want you to move with me to Colorado.”

Wat.

I had no clue this was coming. There had been no hints, no fights, no “hey, I’m not happy I might leave you” talks. He just called me out of the blue and said he wanted to leave me.

Fast forward two months later. He returns from Korea. At this point I pretty much was at the “fuck you, jerk” stage, and had gone out and gotten divorce papers as I had not seen the point of being married to somebody who was going to live hundreds of miles away WITHOUT ME. I was angry. I hated him. And to add insult to injury, he had to live with me for a week before the movers came to get his stuff and relocate him.

A week. I had to live with the guy a week.

Now, back to Spot. Spot, as I said, is mostly an ordinary cat. He’s a little needier than most cats. He demands a pristine box (clean daily), because if it’s not clean he’ll poop immediately outside of it. As far as his bad habits, that’s about it. Spot had been living in the apartment with me, full of my ex-husband’s stuff, never destroying anything, being a normal cat.

Until my husband returned, that is.

The day my husband returned, Spot hid. Spot only ever hides from kids or people that scare him. In this case, Spot wouldn’t go near the guy.

A couple of days later I came home from work, and my husband said “your cat shit on my entertainment center today.” I said “Huh, really? He’s never done that before. I cleaned his box before I left.” Inside I kind of chuckled, but didn’t think much of it.

Three days later, Spot took an epic dump on his favorite leather chair, at which point my ex-husband pretty much let me have it. I finally said “You know, I think Spot knows that I hate your guts. He’s never done this, EVER, the whole time that you were gone. You’d just better hope those movers come sooner than later, because there’s not a damn thing I can do about it.” I then picked up Spot and told him what a good kitty he was.

Couple of days later, the movers took my (now) ex-husbands crap away, and that was the last I saw of him. Spot resumed his normal poop operations and stopped hiding.

So yes, I love cats. During the worst week of my life my cat expressed my rage for my ex-husband in the form of cat shit on his favorite furniture. That right there is loyalty.

06Apr

Entirely too much for Facebook

Filed in Adventures in Gardnerville | My Life | Office Space | Spot & Jack 2 Comments

I started to write a Facebook post, then I realized I was cramming my life’s story into it.  Relocated this whole thing here so I can amass a giant TL;DR.

Here’s some updates, organized by category.  Because organization is the best

The Small Move

I’m moving in 12 days.  I found a little place in downtown Minden, right around the corner from the park.  My landlords are two very cool people, we’ve had a lot of funny conversations as we’ve sorted out the details.

As a result of the move, my house has descended into minor chaos.  Boxes everywhere.  I figured since I’m on a roll, I’m purging as well.  The sheer amount of crap I’m getting rid of is making me worry that I’m on the path to hoarderdom.  Time to put a stop to that.  In my defense, it appears most of my hoarding is centered around technology.  I have an impressive collection of USB cables.

The New Dog

Jack didn’t quite work out at my sister’s house, so I decided to take him back.  It’s been an interesting couple of months with him.  First of all, Spot’s immediate response to Jack was “WTF IS THIS SHIT”, followed by cowering, hissing, growling, and hiding.  Recently they reached a truce.  Jack avoids Spot and Spot controls everything.  I invested in some dog training, and I’ve gotten the little guy under control.  More or less.  It’s also nice having him around on those nights I hear random crashing in the backyard.  My status as a Crazy Cat Lady has been dispelled.

The Breakup

Last October I started dating this guy Todd. Things were going well.  Make it official on Facebook, check.  Do everything together, check.  Bring him to meet the family, check.  Talk about moving in together someday, check.  Sudden announcement from him that he wants to end the relationship and just be friends: what?

I can’t speak to what was going on in his head.  From my perspective, everything was wonderful and I was happy-in-love.  I didn’t see that one coming (that tends to be a pattern with me when I truly invest myself in someone).  I’ve suffered through the broken heart and all the post-relationship misery.  I suppose in some ways I’m still miserable, because for the life of me I just can’t figure out why it all happened that way.  I suppose it’s been on my mind a lot as of late because I have a small pile of things that I need to get back to him, but I haven’t had the courage to go and drop them off on his front door.  Any volunteers?

I can’t say I learned anything valuable from the experience with Todd.  The lessons I’m trying to avoid are the usual bitter ones: Don’t trust anyone, be careful, maybe I’m meant to be alone.  I think I’m more grown up than that.  So I’ll just keep going until I run into the next guy unfortunate enough to want to date me.

Carter is Out of Commission

First off, Carter is the name of my giant Dell XPS I bought around 6 years ago.  Yes I name my my technology.  Even worse, I name them after Stargate SG-1 characters (Daniel, Carter, O’Neill, Hammond, and Teal’c for my VMs).

Anyway, Carter has chugged along doing her thing for 6 years now.  When I bought her, she was bleeding edge:  Quad core, 4 gigs of ram, GeForce 8800 GTX video card.  Since I’ve had her,   I’ve doubled the ram, replaced the 10k RPM Raid 0 with SSDs, and kept her happy with nice monitors, peripherals, and an air can to keep her cat hair free.  And she kept me happy by running along without so much of a blip.  Until last week.

Suddenly, Carter wasn’t so happy.  Constantly locking up.  Sometimes getting stuck at the BIOS during bootup.  After running some memory tests and verifying my SSDs weren’t taking a dump, I came to the realization something had gone horribly awry with one of her underpinning components, likely the motherboard.  She runs still, but only for about 20 minutes before she locks up dies.

Since my expertise in diagnosing motherboard, video card, and power  issues is nil, I’m going to take her to a repair shop and see if she’s salvageable.  I’m hoping a small fix will get her back in shape and I can turn her into a media server.  Otherwise, she may be sent off to be recycled.  I hope she can be fixed.  She’s seen me through the later years of my UT2K4 obsession, and through my newly acquired love of Left 4 Dead.   I has a sad.

Work

My first year at my job was tumultuous.  I had never been a project manager before, and I certainly was not prepared for it.  I made a lot of mistakes.  I learned a lot of things about managing projects from a non-lead standpoint.  Towards the end of last year when I hit my one-year anniversary, I began to reconsider my decision to move away from development   Just managing projects wasn’t making me happy. I was busy, but I didn’t feel challenged and I really hated that.  If there’s one thing I know about me, it’s that I must have something to solve.  Be it writing some new function to do something super amazing cool, or integrating new data into a database.  There are no puzzles to solve in project management, at least – not the type of puzzles I like.  I won’t lie:  I started looking at getting back into data warehousing.  I had a letter drafted to my old job.  I was studying the latest and greatest data warehouse technology.  I was even willing to abandon my Gardnerville hideout and move back to a city.  I felt as if I was losing my edge, and I didn’t want to give it up yet.

Then we had reorganization at work, and suddenly there was opportunity.  I got access to the databases, and I am now allowed to work with some code.  More importantly, I am learning new things.  I don’t ever expect to become a full time developer where I work, because the collection of geniuses there are way out of my league.  I just hope to to be able to help out where I can with what I know, and maybe learn a few things along the way.

If I’m lucky, my next note about work is will confirm the hope I’m feeling now.

Summary

So that’s what’s been going on in a nutshell.  Oh, I am still playing in orchestras.  Didn’t win the audition, but I’m so glad I did it. Totally worth it.  Life is good.

If you made it this far down the page, YOU WIN….something.

 

 

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